#Relationshipgoals

relationship goals

When is the last time that you sat down with your spouse and discussed your relationship goals?

The hashtag #relationshipgoals is running rampant on social media showcasing photos of celebrity couples that people are idolizing over. Maybe the man in the picture is opening the door for his partner or a couple is working out together or maybe they are cuddled up watching a movie.

Basically these photos are a snapshot of what their reality truly is. The use of a hashtag by no means equates to the truth or reality. In some cases, I would like to imagine that their relationship is meaningful and fulfilling, but in others, unfortunately it is likely a cry for attention.

When we first enter a new relationship, things tend to be all warm and fuzzy. You are getting to know your partner and you are intrigued by their goals and desires in life. As the relationship progresses and life starts to take over, we can become less focused on our partner’s goals and needs.

We become focused on work, our social lives, children, and other commitments and we stop being as attentive or focused on healthy relationship communication. It is crucially important for any longterm relationship to re-examine the goals of each person and communicate ways in which those goals can be achieved.

We need to be our partner’s biggest fan and support system in life. Learning how you can support them in the various aspects of their life will strengthen the bond that you have with your spouse. If you have children, it will also set an incredible example of how love can be shown in so many different ways in a relationship.

My advice is to set up a regularly scheduled date with your spouse to discuss your relationship and create a safe space where both people feel that they can be open and honest about how they are feeling. This is the perfect time to discuss issues that may have arisen or it could be a time to put in place a plan for the future.

Remember that one of the keys to a successful conversation with you spouse is to listen with an open mind and heart. Refrain from being critical or judgmental if what your spouse is communicating isn’t what you are expecting or wanting to hear. Finally, ask your partner how you can help them to achieve their goals. It could be something as simple as taking on more responsibilities at home to allow your spouse to go to a weekly exercise class or it could be finding ways to save money to go on a vacation that you have both been wanting to take. 

Every conversation that you have with your spouse will and should be different. Our #relationshipgoals change as we grow and develop as people and they should never be compared to the standard that social media tries to impose upon us. Every relationship is unique and should be celebrated for the love that it brings to the world.

Sitting Too Much is the New Smoking

sitting

The amount of sitting that we do in a day has quickly become a concern for our health and longevity.  Studies reveal that the health impact of sitting for too many hours a day can be compared to the effects that smoking has on our health.

A sedentary lifestyle has been linked to;
  • Cancer
  • Diabetes
  • Obesity
  • Cardiovascular disease
  • Weakened immune system.

Let’s explore some ways to ensure that you don’t fall symptom to these diseases.

Shocking!  How Many Hours Of Sitting We Do In A Day

There is the time in the car on the way to and from work.  The 8 hours at the office.  All in addition to spending time each night on the couch in front of the television, computer or on your phone.

The winter months in Canada can be particularly difficult to get motivated to work out or to be more active.  But there are some simple things that you can add to your daily routine to increase your activity level without having to brave the elements of winter.

Set A Goal To Be Active 10 Minutes Each Hour That You Are Awake!

If you wake up at 6 am and go to bed at 10 pm, then you have 160 minutes to fill with activity.  Don’t panic.  Activity doesn’t mean that you have to be actively exercising.

Activity could be as simple as;
  • Standing at your desk while you make phone calls
  • Tidying your house
  • Preparing dinner
  • Walking to the car (I suggest parking at the far end of the parking lot at work and the grocery store to increase your activity) 
  • Taking a walk on your lunch break
  • Taking a yoga or pilates class, or any other form of exercise that you enjoy

Click here to read, “10 Desk Exercises You Should Be Doing Every Day”.

If you are pressed for time to fit in exercise, try multitasking.

When you drop the kids off at their extracurricular activities, rather than sitting and waiting for them to be finished, use this time to do an impromptu workout.  Walk around the block or if the weather isn’t nice, go to a nearby shopping centre and do a quick lap around the store.

If you are prone to watching a lot of television during the winter, then during the commercial breaks, get up and do a small work out.

Do three reps of 15 squats, lunges, push-ups, sit-ups, or go through a quick yoga flow of stretches.

Get a fitness tracker and aim to hit around 10,000 steps per day.

Especially if you are the type of person that needs to visually see your progress throughout the day.

The benefits of an active lifestyle are far reaching and include;
  • Higher energy levels
  • More restful sleep
  • Lower body mass index
  • Detoxification
  • Better mental clarity

By bringing awareness to our level of activity we can easily make adjustments to our lifestyle.  All this to ensure that we are taking care good of our health and maximizing our longevity.

With Sources From:

http://www.nchpad.org/403/2216/Sedentary~Lifestyle~is~Dangerous~to~Your~Health

5 Tips You Must Know to Destroy Stress Today!

What are you doing to manage your stress? It seems like every day we are inundated by more and more triggers, and the world just seems to be speeding up.

If you can’t keep up, what if you just stopped? What if you just turned off the pace of the rest of the world and went inside for a bit?

The thing is, most of the daily stresses in our lives will not matter in five years. Maybe not even in 5 days! But they are serious triggers in a moment-by-moment day.

Obviously, there are the major stresses, such as the passing of a loved one, major life decisions, new career opportunities, relationships ending and children arriving into your life, but for the daily stresses, how can we manage that better?

Most of us are on the clock.

The majority of stress is because we have way too many things to complete in a day, than the clock gives us time to do!

It’s always speeding up and the to-do list tends to continue to grow.

Between responsibilities at home, at work, at your children’s school, caring for aging parents, creating healthy meals, working on your relationships and squeezing in a little social time, it is really hard to balance everything that life demands of us.

Here are some tips that will sound crazy, and your stressed-out brain will say “ABSOLUTELY NOT! I HAVE NO MORE TIME IN THE DAY FOR ANYTHING!”

But I promise you, that after just a couple weeks, (and in some cases just a couple of days) your life will feel more put together than you could ever imagine in this moment.

1. Quit Sugar, Quit Caffeine, Quit Smoking, Quit Drinking (Yes, you read that right!)

All of these substances wreak havoc on your adrenals and your stress response system. Your body does not need any other external stresses to deal with, and sugar, caffeine, nicotine and alcohol are all very serious triggers for your body. It sends your body out of equilibrium by introducing external substances that are meant to excite or depress you. Your body must fight to expel these substances and adds an extra burden to your health.

Stop the sugary foods – pasta, breads, rice, muffins, cereal, and focus on consuming a colourful plant based diet. Limit your caffeine intake to one coffee per day, no more soda and no more energy drinks! Even switching to herbal tea would make a huge impact! Get off the cigarettes and curb your evening wine or drinks. It all interferes with your entire system.

2. Begin a Daily Stress Reduction Practice

Even for 5 minutes a day, sit in a relaxed position and let you mind focus on gratitude. Focus on your breath, the easiest thing you can be grateful for. Follow your breath and feel its powerful rhythm. Enjoy the moment between inhalation and exhalation – the pause – as there is power in the stillness. This little bit of time will help to centre you for your day.

3. Move that Body!

Seriously, for even 15 minutes a day. Turn the music up and dance! Or speed walk around the neighbourhood with your family. Be silly, take turns seeing who can walk the fastest! Get your heart rate up and have fun! Try a class at the gym, do a yoga video on YouTube, or try a high intensity interval training session. Just move it more often and your body will reward you by feeling energized and more alive.

4. Master Your Mind

Decide what demands your attention and what can wait. Prioritize your to-do list and understand that you can only do what you can do. Try to stop focusing on staying ahead of the clock. What are you rushing against anyway? We all end up in the same place, so why rush through life so quickly?

5. Get Adjusted!

Your spine needs to be in alignment to let you function at 100%! Get adjusted regularly and know that the interferences that find their way into your spine via stress, injuries, repetition and toxins are being removed by your Doctor of Chiropractic.

Stressed to the MAX!

Hippocrates in 460-377 BC was aware of ‘stress’.  So why has it taken so long for ‘stress’ and mental health issues to finally receive some acknowledgement in OUR time?  Walter Cannon in 1929 confirmed that the stress response is part of a unified body-mind system to take flight or fight. Canadian scientist Hans Selye spent 40 years of his career extending Cannon’s concepts and has since made stress a major concept in psychology and medicine today.

Lately, everyone seems to be getting on this ‘hot’ topic. The media, talk shows, books, research, the Occupational Health & Safety Act, Worker’s Safety and Insurance Board, and the list goes on, finally want to talk about stress and mental health issues. What took them so long?

The World Health Organization (WHO) defines Mental Health as, ‘The state of well-being in which every individual realizes his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community.’

The Canadian Mental Health Association defines Stress as ‘the body’s response to a real or perceived threat. That response is meant to get people ready for some kind of action to get them out of danger. But most of the threats people face today aren’t something that they can fight or run away from. These threats are usually problems that people have to work through. Stress is a reaction to a situation—it isn’t about the actual situation.’

Here are my thoughts about stress and mental health issues:

They are REAL. They EXIST.

Very few understand the IMPACT stress and mental health issues have to one’s life, unless you’ve been there, or know someone that’s been there. For those of you who are still sitting on the fence as to whether or not you think this is truly an illness, I would say, ‘it’s time to wake up’. This illness is affecting 1 out of 4 people daily! People lose their relationships, their jobs, their motivation to live, their clarity, their understanding of self AND finding all that again, takes time, patience and plenty of love and support. It’s a long and up hill battle to get your life back, and to eventually find out that your life will never be the same because, THIS stress, mental health issue, changes you, forever.

Have a heart.

If you feel a friend or a loved one is not their self, take the take to listen and extend a helping hand. Suggest natural therapies such as homeopathy, naturopathy, counseling, chiropractic and other modalities to assist them back to health, to work, and to their life again. Slowly, with understanding and guidance, those experiencing stress and mental health issues, will make a recovery to a place of wellness. Until then, direct them to organizations such as the Canadian Mental Health Association or Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, or a psychologist, psychiatrist, social worker or other professional that has an expertise in the field. Together, we can make a difference in someone’s life with compassion and genuine interest by acknowledging and honoring the stress they are going through with support and direction to expert care.

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Blog by Guest Author:

Pic-of-LucieLucie M.H. Fournier RN, COHN(C), BA (Psych)
Founder/Workplace Health Strategist
With over 30 years of experience in disability management, and a return on investment on average of 1:7, Fournier disAbility & Health provides customized and results oriented services in Absenteeism Management including Attendance, Sick Time/Short, Long Term Disability, and WSIB claims for employers across Ontario.
Expertise in 5 distinct niches of disAbility management include:
1. Complex claims management resolution
2. Mental health claim return to work & accommodations
3. Advanced level training for internal claims manager to make a significant impact on the health of the employee and wealth of the organization
4. Transitional Leadership when moving to & from a 3rd party disAbility Management company
5. Sensitive claims & disAbility management of professional staff, such as HR, health team, and/or executives such as supervisors, managers, directors
Find Lucie at www.FournierHealth.com and https://www.facebook.com/fournierhealth/ and https://www.linkedin.com/in/luciemhfournier