If you have read Gary Chapman’s book called The Five Love Languages, you would know that he describes five different styles of showing your love to your spouse or loved ones. Chapman identifies the five love languages as: Words of Affirmation Acts of Service Receiving Gifts Quality Time Physical Touch

Have you ever considered what your own Self-Love Language is? How do you best respond to acts of love done by you for you?

Most of us run through our days checking off our to-do lists and ensuring that the needs of everyone else are met. By the time the day is over, you may be feeling tired, drained, or even overwhelmed by the never-ending list of tasks that are yet to be completed. Unfortunately, living like this is not benefiting your health or your relationships with family, friends, children, or co-workers. It is time to tune in to what your self-love language is and start showing yourself some love. The five self-love languages are the same as what we listed above. The only difference is that you are going to be performing these acts of love for yourself to tend to the most important relationship you will ever nurture: The one with yourself. This concept might feel strange at first if you aren’t used to focusing your attention on yourself. But I encourage you to power through those feelings and really work on filling up your own love tank so that you can be a more grounded and happy person.

Let’s take a look at how these different types of self-love languages could be applied to our lives. 


1. Words of Affirmation – The inner dialog that you have going on with yourself is vitally important to your health and self-image. Spend time everyday saying nice things to yourself.  While you brush your teeth, or in the car on the way to work, tell yourself 3 things that you value and love about yourself. With each passing day this task will become easier as you become more comfortable with having this type of dialog with yourself. 2. Acts of Service – To perform an act of service for yourself, look at ways to fill your heart with joy.  It may be delving into your faith or volunteering at a local charity, or donating something to someone in need. 3. Receiving gifts – Set aside twenty dollars per week (or whatever you can afford) to use to buy yourself something that you have always wanted, or invest in a hobby. 4. Quality Time – Spend time doing something that fills you with joy and relieves stress.  It may be taking a yoga class, learning how to do a hobby, reading a great book, or it could be as simple as taking a rejuvenating nap. 5. Physical touch – To show yourself love through physical touch, you could get a massage, a manicure or pedicure, get a new haircut, or get a reiki treatment. Other options would be to sweat it out at the gym or your favourite workout class. Whatever your self-love language may be, start today by making yourself a priority.

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